Single living. It ain’t that bad.

” I think that in view of present distress it is good for a person to remain as he is.” -1 Corinthians 7:26 (ESV)

In the back of mind is this gnawing fear that I will die alone. No husband, no children, just me, the floorboards, and my books. Most days, I don’t really think about it, the thought just sits there waiting to rear its ugly head on a day when I least expect it or when I’m extra emotional. It is comforting to know that I am not alone in this sometimes gnawing fear, as I know many other young women that fear and ponder the same thing .

Sorry menfolk, I don’t know how you feel in this area.

However, despite the fear that rests in almost every young woman’s mind regarding the perpetual single life, I have found great contentment in being single in the recent weeks.For example, I enjoy eating in restaurants alone. Once I get over the initial awkwardness of sitting alone at a fast food establishment or telling the hostess at a nicer restaurant “Just one,” I enjoy the solitude. I sometimes take a book or other materials, and not only to I get things done, I get to eat (another treasured activity). I’ve also been to the movies alone, and that’s not nearly as desperately lonesome as others make it to be. It’s quite enjoyable, too.

I’m also convinced that my state of singleness has allowed me to strengthen my Christian walk.  I used to scoff at the Apostle Paul when he wrote to the Corinthians saying, “it is good for them [ the unmarried and widows] to remain single as I am” (1 Cor 7:7). As a once upon a time believer in the popular thought that I needed someone else to make me fully happy, I would often ignore this passage and sit in pity. For someone who imagined in middle school being at least engaged by 21 (at the latest!) singleness into high school and college can come as a blow to the self. In the meantime, as a single woman, I will wait for someone meaningful to come along, but it would do me well to meditate more on 1 Corinthians 7:7 and climb out of the pity hole when I feel myself climbing into it. It would also benefit me to stop focusing on myself and to focus more on the Lord. However, I’m a work in progress and I believe this is what part of the single life is all about.

Despite my rocky relationship with the single life over the years and even in recent weeks, I have learned that the single life is truly a blessing. However, I am also a strong supporter of marriage, as I believe that it is a beautiful picture of the relationship between Christ and the Church. As I  wait and travel along, continuing my career as a single work in progress, I’ll keep using my single years to benefit the Kingdom of God and to eat alone at as many restaurants as I can with a book in tow.

No single living ain’t that bad, as long as you know how to use those years and you also know where to locate the best restaurants where you can read a book in peace.


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5 thoughts on “Single living. It ain’t that bad.

  1. As a single gal myself, I so can relate to emotional ups and downs of being single longer than I had planned. But I agree that both singleness and marriage are blessings with one not being superior to the other. The key is learning how to make the most of the blessing that God gives us.

  2. ha, I’ve been thinking about this a lot recently, also very single! I like to think that I’m learning more about how to be in a longterm relationship due to this time where I can focus on getting firmer in my faith and working out all the kinks in who I am. And when God sends some tall and handsome faithful guy with a heart for the poor my way, I’ll be ready!

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